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Thursday, January 31, 2013

Day 6 and a $50,000 realization!

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Today has been strange, but in the best way possible.  I’ve been a giant ball of positive energy!  I haven’t had this much energy in a long time!  I think being 100% nicotine free and on several vitamins/supplements has something to do with it.  I also think I’m happy, flat out happy.  I think Stacy is happy, the kids are happy, our family is happy.  All of that is what makes me happy.  Wouldn’t it make you happy??

 
I have been moving pretty much non stop all day.  However, I’ve been using my weird positive energy for the good, I promise.  I’ve been washing dishes, making lunch, vacuuming, doing laundry, taking the dog out, cleaning up, etc.  Hell, it’s not even 2:30 yet!  I have only had one “fake dip” so far today, although I’ve had several cravings.  Staying legitimately busy is the BEST way to beat cravings, well that or sleep.  I like to stay busy, that way I can sleep at night.  One of the side effects of quitting dip is insomnia.  So far I’ve been lucky; I haven’t had many issues sleeping.

 
I think I have been driving Stacy nuts!  BUT, I think I’ve been driving her nuts in a good way!  I’m in a happy, positive, confident mood as compared to a bitter, grouchy and failing mood.

 
Ok…..Are you ready for this?  Seriously, ARE. YOU. READY???  Here we go…

 
Stacy and I have sat down and figured out how much I have spent of chewing tobacco over the years. When we figured it out and that final number popped up, it made my heart hurt, my stomach hurt and my legs got weak.  It made me cringe.  And on top of all that, every factor that we weren’t absolutely sure of, we estimated low, meaning we gave me the benefit of the doubt.  So, after calculation of how much money I/we have spent JUST on chewing tobacco over the years…..It came out to $47,520.00!!!!!

 
Yes, you read that right.  And Sadly, I guarantee it’s higher.  Like I said, we estimated LOW!  Imagine what I/we could have done with almost $50,000.00! A lot of stuff!

 
I just got back from Turkey Hill.  I got two large frozen cokes and a 16oz coffee.  It came out to $3.58.  While I was putting my card back in my wallet, I over heard the guy behind ask for a pack of Marlboro Reds.  He also had a 24oz coffee.  I listened and looked on (stalked) very carefully to make sure he didn’t order anything else.  His final order one coffee and one pack of cigarettes.  Guess what it came to price wise?  Go ahead and guess…..If you guessed $9.79 you are correct!  It was $9.79 for one coffee and one pack of smokes!  I knew tobacco was expensive, but wow!  No, chew isn’t THAT expensive, but I always bought several cans at a time.  Now you can see how fast money can be burnt when you have an addiction to nicotine huh?

 
Ok, back to the good news.  I’ve had several good days in a row.  Today is the absolute best I’ve had yet!  Positive energy ALL day and night!   Yes, I still get many cravings through out the day but I’m getting better at controlling them with my mind. I have great support and many people who believe in me.  That means A LOT!

 
When someone chews tobacco for 16 years, what is a good thing to try when he finally quits?  Teeth whitening! Since we are doing this blog, I’m going to use a cheap store bought whitening and Stacy is going to use a home remedy that she found on Pinterest.  BOTH are supposed to whiten our teeth.  Perhaps I’m ignorant, but I have never seen or heard someone use a store bought teeth whitener and have major success with it.  That doesn’t mean they don’t work, it just means I don’t know anyone who used them and had success. With that being said, it makes me question the kind I’m using even MORE, considering it was less than $7.00 to buy at the store.  If I actually notice a difference, I’ll be very pleasantly surprised!  I honestly believe that Stacy’s home remedy will work better.  We shall see! See below.  On the top is the store bought stuff (duh), on the bottom is the home remedy. The teeth whitening competition begins tomorrow!
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Wednesday, January 30, 2013

IT'S GIVEAWAY TIME!!!

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Yep, you read that right! We are doing our very first giveaway! We appreciate all of the support and we want to give back with a small gift of our appreciation! So you want to know what you have a chance to win?  C'mon it's Brian and I we're talking about so would you expect anything less than a gift that has to do with food? lol  That's right... THIS is what I'm talking about....
 
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The Details.... This is a $25 gift card to one of the four restaurants of your choice.  They are Outback Steakhouse, Bonefish Grill, Carrabba's Italian Grill, Roys, or Flemings Prime Steakhouse & Wine Bar.

 
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  1. Like our Facebook Page "Life Gone Live" https://www.facebook.com/LifeGoneLive
  2. Share our page on your wall.
  3. Comment on this post telling us which restaurant listed on the card that you would choose from!
 
That's it!  The giveaway will run until we have reached 100 followers on our Facebook page!  A winner will then been chosen at random (by http://www.random.org/). We will announce the winner both here and on our Facebook page once all information has been verified.

THANK YOU again for all of your kind words, friendship and support and GOOD LUCK!!!

Day 5, Mini hugs and pulled pork!

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Back to school for the kids!  I woke up, took the pup out and had a few cravings.  No cravings that were unbearable.  I mentioned it before; being dip free for 72 straight hours means my body has become 100% nicotine free.  It doesn’t stop cravings and it won’t stop the mental aspects, but so far, I haven’t had any head aches, body aches or soreness since day three ended.  Will it continue? I have no idea…

 

Today We’re going to get my LAST few cans of fake chew.  After today, I will no longer even chew the fake stuff.  Please keep in mind this fake chew has NO nicotine and NO tobacco.  Then why stop chewing it if it helps me?  I can’t do it forever!  Hell, it costs more than the real stuff does.  We’ll get more into the cost of chewing tobacco tomorrow.  We will give you some shocking details.  I guarantee you or someone you know smokes/chews and you might want to sit down and figure out how much money you or your friends smoke/chew away.  That’s assuming quitting for your health isn’t important enough for you.

 

Tonight Stacy and I have a date with a BBQ pork loin!  It’s cooking right now and it’s all lathered in a nice BBQ wet rub.  We’re cooking it low and slow-On low for eight hours.  I’ll be slobbering on and off all day until we finally shred it up and have a pulled pork sandwich!  Hurry up eight hours!  See the final Product below! 

 

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It’s early evening now and I still haven’t experienced any aches or pains.  I’ve had some mental cravings but nothing physical.  Today has been a good day, just like yesterday was.  The first three days were bad, with day three being the absolute the worst, but overall, I’ve been lucky.  I have also been lucky to have the support that I have.  Stacy, my mom and Stacy’s mom have been great.  Friends I didn’t even know I had, have been sincere and genuine with their words and positive comments.  I’m truly thankful.  I have a long way to go, but I’m thankful for any support I get and I’m thankful for it ANY time it comes.

 

I even had Beckett (5 year old) walk up to me and hug me and tell me how proud of me he is.  Hearing that from the little man just made my heart jump.  It felt good….Wait, it felt GREAT!  How could I let him down now?  I can’t.  I won’t.  I won’t let anyone down.  As Stacy says, “I’m stronger than nicotine.”

 

The night is about to end and it has been another good one! It has only been five days of this 100 day journey, but I am happy and I know Stacy is happy as well.  WE are doing it and I’m thankful for that.  Goodnight all.....

Tuesday, January 29, 2013

Day 4: The Best Day Yet! (and a special surprise for YOU!)

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Wow!  That’s all I can say.  I can’t even begin to explain in an accurate way how different I feel this morning than I did at this same time yesterday.  Yes, I still want to chew, I still have cravings and all that stuff, but I feel pretty damn good!  So far, no moodiness, grouchiness, headaches, body aches, etc. 

Maybe it’s because Stacy and I have been super damn busy since about 6am this morning.  The kids have off school because snow/ice and there was a terrible fire just up the street from us.  It’s unbelievably sad to see.  I don’t know the families who lost their homes but that doesn’t stop me from feeling horrible. 

Stacy also brought up a good point.  We are never thankful enough for our volunteer fire fighters.  We always assume that towns that have a small volunteer crew never really have to do anything.  Well, we’re WRONG!  The volunteer fire fighters have been at this fire since 4:30am and they are still there in full force working on this fire at noon.  Please make sure you thank your local volunteer fire fighters the next time you get a chance.

One of the things I started on the same day I quit chewing, was vitamins and supplements.  I don’t believe they will help me quit chewing, but they will help my body promote a healthier way of living.  Below is a photo of what I have been taking.

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I can’t emphasize enough how much better today has been than yesterday. The kids had a snow day, which was a blessing in disguise.  Why, you ask?  It kept us very busy! A five and seven year old inside a house all day can find numerous ways to keep adults busy. 

I’m actually proud to say this is a boring blog.  I still get lots of cravings but NONE and I mean NONE were like the ones I got yesterday.  I would have been grumpy towards Mother Theresa that day.  Speaking of Mother Theresa, Stacy has been my Mother Theresa.  She’s been there every second of the way. When I’m grumpy, she doesn’t back down or get sad, she puts me in my place!  According to my mom “All men need that from time to time.”  Although I hate admitting it, she’s right!

Well, we’re settling down for the night, about ready to hit the sheets, watching some Iron Chef America and guess what Mother Theresa just did?  Surprised me with an AWESOME back rub! There has never been a better time in my entire life for a back rub. It was the greatest back rub I ever had!  I love you Stacy!  Goodnight all…

Oh before we go....  Don't forget to read tomorrow!  We have a special surprise for you!  We'll give you a hint below.....

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Monday, January 28, 2013

Day Three A.K.A the Day of Hell.

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Day three!  Something weird just happened to me, but  I’m trying to figure out a way to put it in writing so all of you don’t think I fell off the deep end…..Or worse.  Still thinking….

 
Ok let’s try this.  First of all, today was BY FAR the worst wake up I’ve had in my three days.  I instantly wanted chew, my head was pounding, I was irritable and I sincerely considered telling Stacy that I’m willing to admit in the blog that I chewed today JUST so I could have one.  It really was THAT bad for about 45 minutes, non stop. 

 
Then I realized something.  Try some positivity.  The cravings and lack of nicotine have done NOTHING but my fill my head with negativity, and I was VERY close to just letting that negativity win.  It would have been easier, right? 

 
Then, I thought about something that Stacy told me last night after I told her I was probably going to fail again anyway.  When I say “again,” remember, I “quit” for six weeks in the past and failed.   Yes, I was having a whining pity party.  Anyway, she said “learn from the past because you can’t change it so take a negative and turn it into a positive. You’re better and stronger than nicotine.  Don’t allow something else (nicotine) to have that much power over you.”  I loved hearing that last night.  When I woke up this morning with the terrible headache, grouchiness and WORST EVER craving, that same positive advice meant absolutely nothing to me.  It was silly.  She’s not the one trying to quit dip.  She’s not the one with the headaches and achy body.  She’s not the one going mentally insane. 

 
After about 45 minutes of all the symptoms I just mentioned, I had two choices:  Go find chew or find a way to beat the craving.  That’s when I seriously just kept repeating what Stacy told me last night.  It may sound cheesy or weird to you guys, but I just kept repeating it over and over again.  I am stronger than nicotine; I won’t allow it to have that much power over me. I just kept saying it and saying it.  Again and again….

 
And what do you know?  The WORST (by far) craving I’ve had in my three days went away.  I know, it sounds like something you’d see on weird channel at 4am, which is why I tried to deny it.  However, REAL positivity worked!  Will it work every time?  Probably not, but I’ll worry about those cravings when I get to them.  Did I mention all of this happened and it’s not even 10:15am? 

 
I’m actually admitting I’m scared.  I’m scared of many things.  I’m scared the positivity that Stacy has me believing won’t last.  I’m scared I’ll let her down, the kids down, my family down, her family down, EVERYONE down! I’m scared my grouchiness will cause Stacy to tell me to take a hike.  Could I blame her?  Nope.  Would you blame her?  Nope!  I’m scared that I’ll push her away and start chewing again all at the same time.  Talk about failure!  If that happens, I could write a “How to Miserably Fail 101” book and it’d be a best seller.

 
In case you haven’t noticed, I’m getting more cravings literally as I type.  Stacy is up in the shower and is enjoying some much deserved peace and quiet.  I wouldn’t blame her if she stayed up there all day, anything to avoid me.  Hell, if I could I’d avoid me! I keep thinking to myself, why put myself and the people I care about the most through all of this?  Just have a dip and it’ll go away….Right?  No!  I was miserable because I was chewing.  I knew ALLLLL the negatives about it and couldn’t deny them anymore.  I just hope I don’t lose Stacy and the kids along with this addiction.  If I did, I would have no one to blame but myself, just like I have no one to blame but my self for picking up a can of dip 16 years ago.

 
I just want the terrible cravings to stop, my head to feel better, my body to feel better.  I want my terrible attitude about life to get back to where it belongs.  It’s not fair to Stacy and the kids.  I feel like I’m putting myself in a lose-lose situation by doing all of this.  If I quit, I make everyone miserable and push them away.  If I keep chewing, well duh, there are 5,000 reasons why I’d lose if I did that. I’m in a major funk and even the positivity that worked earlier….Well it’s laughing in my face now.  Why Should I continue to put Stacy through this?  Hell, I don’t care about myself, but I sure as hell care about her.  She did NOTHING to deserve my miserable attitude.  I’m not sure why she has kept me around.  I don’t imagine it’ll last much longer.  I couldn’t blame her either…

 
Do I think this would be easier on my own?  My ego says yes.  My brain and common sense say I couldn’t do it on my own, which I admit is probably true.  But is it really worth making the woman I love miserable?

 
It’s early afternoon now and I feel like this day is dragging ON and ON.  Stacy has been upstairs for most of the day, which I’m 99.9999% sure is my fault.  She’s avoiding me.  I would avoid me to if it was physically possible.

 
It’s now later in the day, 2:30 or so.  I haven’t chewed.  I haven’t done anything.  I’m pretty much a useless human body.  I’m stronger than nicotine….I am.

 
Guess what!?  Some patience, self discipline and A LOT of love from Stacy and I’m feeling ok.  It’s about 6pm right now and things have been much better.  It may sound weird, just like my “positivity speech” did earlier, but it’s amazing how well a hug and some old fashioned positivity can work.  Do I still want a dip?  Yes.  Will I want some tomorrow?  I’m pretty damn sure I will!  However, I’m in 10 times better shape than I was for almost the whole day.

 
It’s time for bed…And I have officially made it for 72 hours, three days.  Three days is a big deal for one reason.  According to the experts, if you go without nicotine for 72 straight hours, your body is officially 100% nicotine free.  What does that mean?  I’m not exactly sure.  I hope it means I won’t have days where I go for six or seven straight hours of being miserable and wanting a dip. 

 
I want to end this blog by posting a quote that Stacy found and immediately showed me.  She knew how perfect this quote was for me to see and understand.  Let’s hope tomorrow goes better!  THANK YOU Stacy.  I love you.
 
 
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Sunday, January 27, 2013

A weekend in review: Stuffed pepper virgins, big spenders,big talkers and the naughtiest book I've ever seen at the library!

Stuffed Pepper Virgins (read this while hearing Madonna's Like a Virgin playing in the back of your mind). Yep that's what we were until yesterday. The last time I had them, Brian's mom made them and brought four up to us and before I knew it three of them had mysterious disappeared...IN BRIAN'S BELLY! lol

Brian and I were both hungry for them but neither of us had made them before.  We went to the store armed with a list and a mission.  We got all of the ingredients, came home and started to cook!  My review... we did a'ight but they always say a mother's food tastes better because it's made with love and I sure do believe it!  We cooked them for over an hour and a half and I can honestly say although the taste was pretty good the texture was WAY better with Brian's mom's! I spoke with her today and she suggested that we either boil them a little before we bake them or we bake them at a reduced temp (325 versus 350) for up to three hours.  Any suggestions for the next time would also be welcomed and appreciated!  I'll insert a picture for you... don't judge they aren't very pretty gals to begin with and due to fat kid syndrome, I only had bad lighting and an iphone to work with since my hunger and laziness dominated the fact that I didn't feel like finding the regular camera to take a better picture!



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For those of your interested in what we used, I am posting the recipe below...

Stuffed Peppers
4 bell Peppers - We used yellow, green, orange and red.  (stems cut off and insides cleaned out)
1 lb ground beef (we used 80/20)
1 Cup cooked rice
1 tsp onion powder
1/4 tsp salt
1/2 tsp minced garlic
1 egg
1/4 cup of bread crumbs (we used Italian style)
1 29 oz can of tomato sauce

We boiled and fully cooked the rice, we then mixed 1 Cup of cooked rice with the pound of meat (some recipes said to brown it first but we didn't because we're rebels like that! he he), next we mixed the onion powder, salt, egg, minced garlic and bread crumbs together.  After mixing all ingredients thoroughly, we stuffed each pepper to the top.  We covered a thin layer of sauce in the bottom of a 13x9 baking dish and added the peppers,  We poured the remaining sauce over each pepper.  We covered with foil and baked them for an hour and a half (setting a timer and basting the sauce back over each pepper half way through cooking).  During the final 15 min of baking I added a small amount of mozzarella cheese to the top of each pepper.  We baked it for a total of an hour and a half at 350.

While our peppers were baking we put the rest of our groceries away.  I know that I myself like to stalk other peoples "grocery hauls" so I thought I'd end your curiosity about ours (oh c'mon don't act like you didn't want to know) and allow you to see what our small shopping trip consisted of.....
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We got stuff to make smoothies, the stuffed pepper ingredients, lunchables for the kids, more lean cuisines, snacks, ingredients to make chex mix, pancakes, and the best deal of the day... first we got the most AMAZING Greek yogurt with fruit (Brian and I LOVE testers at Sam's Club and Walmart) and they did NOT disappoint today!  They not only hooked us up with multiple samples, but provided us with coupons so that we could get 2 of the Muller Greek yogurts for $1.08! Next up for deal of the day were pork loins to make pulled pork sandwiches (with a side of coleslaw) they were normally $11 and $12 and with the sale and coupons that we found on two of them we ended up getting BOTH for $9!  We planned on making this for dinner today but instead the "big talkers" had a healthy meal of this.....
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Puh-lease people... tell me you haven't done this before! lol  It's been a really rough day and after you read Brian's post tomorrow you'll understand the need for comfort junk food!

Here is where the big spenders come in.... this was our biggest purchase yesterday....
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Both Brian's laptop and mine are totally hanging on for dear life.  I think its a result of Beckett and Auden downloading anything that looks cool off of the internet. We decided we both need a computer that is more reliable than one that produces a warning basically telling us that we're darn lucky it hasn't crashed yet.  So as a result say hello to our new computers!

Lastly we stopped at the local library this weekend.  It was the first time that Brian was there.  As I showed him around, I took him upstairs to the children's section and we discussed bringing the kids here once a week for books. As we went to leave we couldn't believe our eyes!  THIS is what we saw!
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Do you see what we see?  How did they miss this?!?! What a naughty little book!  It makes me giggle every time I see it and I swear I can hear a mean raspy voice saying "you effing kids better remember to return your library books mother$*&!'ssssssss!" Then again I'm not sure what I expected from a library who's wall plague reads "Quench your THURST for knowledge" I sure hope they got a discount on that plaque for lack of spell check abilities!

Here's hoping your weekend was as fun and eventful as ours was! 
Stacy

Day Two! 24 hours and BEYOND!

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9am on day two. I made it through the first full day, 24 hours and beyond! When I woke up this morning I felt great!  Yesterday I made it three minutes until I had a terrible chew craving.  Today, I made it about 10 minutes. I don’t have a headache (yet), body aches (yet) or anything that is really physically bothering me (yet.)

However, my brain keeps saying “Have a dip!”  “You need a dip!”  Hurry, you need one!”   It’s making me want to chew on my own teeth.  I’m continuing to move by doing whatever I can-jogging up and down the steps, shoveling the snow off the sidewalk (the same snow that I already shoveled lol), making a cup of coffee, etc.

Speaking of coffee, I have become a “coffee drinker” since this journey started.  I really don’t know much about coffee.  I know that I like regular coffee with a little bit of cream and 3-4 packets of sweet n low.  I don’t really even need cream. We have a Keurig Machine and I truly enjoy the “Donut Shop” K-cups.  We are always looking for new flavors and what not but you have to watch out, no one wants to pay $10.00-$13.00 for something they may end up not liking.  One thing I can assure you, there are PLENTY of K-cups out there that I wouldn’t like!  The strong the coffee, I less I’ll enjoy it.

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Thanks to Stacy, we have stayed rather busy today.  We went to the grocery store, library, Wal-Mart and Dollar Tree.  That really helped me stay busy and keep my mind off chewing.  However, the strain from the lack of nicotine combined with the running around has really exhausted me.  I feel ok, as in I don’t feel achy or even irritable, I just feel flat out exhausted.  If I was still chewing, or NEVER started chewing, all the running around today would have been no sweat.  Instead I’m tired and beat at 3:40pm on a Saturday.  Pathetic. Then again, I’d rather be quitting dip and tired because of it, than still dipping and “feeling” fine. 

In yesterday’s blog I told you I would tell you more about the sunflower seeds I have been chewing to help me.  Most people, including me believe/believed that sunflower seeds are all the same, regardless of flavor at the end of the day.  I believed that as well, until yesterday.  I bought a flavor called “Spicy Sweet Chili,” and I can’t even begin to mention how good they are!  They are AWESOME!  Not to mention, I got them at the Dollar Tree!  Only a buck!

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We’re having stuffed peppers for dinner.  It’ll be the first time Stacy and I have ever made them.  My mom made them when I was growing up and my whole family loved them!  Tonight Stacy and I will give it a try!  See Stacy’s newest post later tonight for the results!

Now, before I end this blog for the night, I have something to get off my chest.  Stacy and I realized this today.  The more you care about your body for the good, the more expensive it is!  When someone TRULY (not half assed) tries to switch their diet from eating anything and everything to a balanced, nutrient rich diet, it WILL cost you more!  We also noticed something else that backs up this very same reasoning.  Today we went into the Discount Tobacco Store to buy FAKE chew (yes, FAKE CHEW!) and we realized that three cans of nicotine free fake chewing tobacco costs more than three cans of real chewing tobacco!  Are you kidding me!? Thankfully, tonight is my last chewing the fake stuff to.  Oh and Stacy has a nick name for fake dip….Fip!  Get it?

It’s bed time and my head is absolutely killing me.  I’m not in a good mood and I just want to sleep.  However, I can say I made it through 48 hours!  PLEASE let tomorrow be better.  

Friday, January 25, 2013

A Pretty Nice Little Saturday....

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Well, um, actually a pretty nice little Saturday, we're going to go to Home Depot. Yeah, buy some wallpaper, maybe get some flooring, stuff like that. Maybe Bed, Bath, & Beyond, I don't know, I don't know if we'll have enough time.
Frank the Tank, Old School.


So..... this is pretty much my Saturday with Brian tomorrow except ours would go a little something like...... "well, um, actually a pretty nice little Saturday, We're going to go to the library (any books you guys would recommend?), Walmart, maybe buy a new computer, stuff like that. Maybe Dollar Tree, I don't know, I don't know if we'll have time." 

 Yeah that's our wild and crazy Saturday without the kiddos! :)


In addition to sharing the uber exciting details about our upcoming Saturday out (insert eye roll here), we also thought we'd take a moment to share what our blog will be about.  In addition to Brian's current 100 Day Dip Quit Challenge, we'll be sharing recipes, mindless chatter about the shenanigans and nonsensical goings on in our lives, as well as random funnies, handy tips and info, manly matters, girly chit chat, and on occasion (although if you know us it might be rare) deep, meaningful, mature conversations. 

Basically we are giving you a peek into our "Life Gone Live".  Let us entertain you and enjoy the show!

~Stacy




Day One!


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Well, it’s day one!  Guess what?  Day one has sucked and it’s continuing to suck, but I truly believe it could and will get worse in the near future. 

I woke up and everything was fine……for three minutes.  Seriously, for three minutes I thought this “Dip Quit” Journey was cake!  Then my first of VERY many cravings punched me directly in the face, and in the stomach, and pretty much everywhere else. 

I’ve had the “Fog” today, which is where I don’t see anything clear, my brain is confused, my forehead has a ton of pressure on it and it feels like two large knives have been inserted into my forehead.  One of those knives has a midget doing pull ups from the handle; the other knife has a midget jumping on top of the handle.  My point is, even my headaches don’t even know how to behave!

So far, I haven’t eaten a TON of food.  I was expecting to eat non stop.  I guess I have eaten some, but as of 12:39 pm I have eaten: One bagel with bacon and cheese, a few handfuls of Sunflower seeds (will tell you more about the AWESOME seeds soon), a few pieces of hard candy, fake chew (NO nicotine) and one Meatloaf/Mashed Potato Lean Cuisine.  I know Lean Cuisine is just a “TV Dinner” but it was fantastic!  I definitely recommend them and Stacy and I are both going to be buying more.  I believe she had the Five Cheese Rigatoni.

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As I was sitting in the parking lot waiting for the kids to come out of school I just happened to look over and saw the guy beside me spitting into a bottle.  In case you didn’t know, this 100 Day Journey is to help me QUIT chewing.  I’m not sure why but seeing him spit into that bottle made want a dip instantly.  Yes, I know how gross that sounds.  I also know that I have a heavy addiction to nicotine and my “choice” of nicotine has been through smokeless tobacco for the last 16 years.  To me, spitting into a bottle meant two things.  Someone was chewing tobacco and chances were that someone was me, but not this time!  Yes sir!

3pm-ish. Trying to keep my mind off dipping!  I’m failing…Stacy had a great idea.  She told me to try and make something and we decided I’d whip up a batch of our home made chex mix.  It helped me stay focused on getting through day one and it kept me productive at the same time.  Good idea Stacy!

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For dinner we went to get some Chinese takeout.  For those of you who don’t know us, we absolutely LOVE Chinese takeout!  Want to hear something ridiculous?  Chewing tobacco even changed the way I eat/ate Chinese takeout!  Usually, when we go get Chinese buffet take out, I don’t steal any food off the buffet.  Ok, that’s a lie; I “test” a few things here and there.  However, tonight, because I haven’t been chewing, I “tested” five-six things!  I HAD to be doing something to keep my mind off chewing!  Oh, and by the way, I won the “is she pregnant?” bet with Stacy about the chick at the Chinese Restaurant. Ask her about it! I don’t get to brag too often, so I am tonight while I can.

Well folks, it’s 9:20, which means I’m 21 hours and 20 minutes into Day 1 of our Journey.  I’m proud to say I have not touched any smokeless tobacco.  Does Stacy want to punch me in the throat for the fits I threw today?  Probably….
  
We made it!  Only 99 days to go….

100 Day Dip Quit Journey!

Hello all! I’m sure you’re wondering what this is all about, aren’t you? It’s about a few things…accountability, responsibility and hopefully, in the end, success! I assume you’re STILL wondering what the hell I’m talking about, right? I’m talking about quitting chewing tobacco ONCE AND FOR ALL!

 Many of our close friends and family were/are under the impression that I have already quit. I did, sort of….for six weeks. Several months ago I did quit. I quit cold turkey and made it for six weeks, give or take a few days. I had absolutely no chew during that time and I had myself believing I was in the clear and heading towards the home stretch of being able to comfortably say “I’ll never chew again!.”

 I was wrong…..super duper wrong! The cravings didn’t stop. They never stopped. However, for six weeks I was beating those cravings, with the help and support of my beautiful (out of my league) fiancĂ©, my family, and her family. Family support, which I was very lucky to have, was a wonderful advantage. In the end, what happened was simply a failure ON MY BEHALF. I failed. I don’t know how else to say it. For any male, it’s hard to admit to himself AND publicly that he failed. I didn’t want to admit it, but I’ll say this: Admitting I failed is one hell of a first step to success.

 Part of the reason for this blog is to ask ALL of you for help and support during this “Dip Quit Journey.” If I know I have my family and friends supporting me, and all of you out there in cyber space are reading this (vlogs will be coming to) and “checking up” on our daily progress, I truly believe I can quit once and for all.
 Hell, maybe this journey will even motivate someone whom I have never met to quit chewing/smoking.

 100 days. After extensive research, I have realized that one of the things that many advice websites have in common is the “100 day Journey.” I have finally learned I will NEVER be in the clear when it comes to cravings for chew, but they CAN be managed and defeated with self discipline and support, which again, is where all of you come in! So, are you in with us? Are you prepared to read about and see videos of our 100 Day Journey of quitting dip!? (And much, much more.)

 Tonight, at 11:59pm on January 24th, 2013 our journey begins. Through blogs, vlogs, and photos we’ll take you through the ups and downs of this journey. We will NOT fabricate anything. If I’m in a bad mood, you’ll know. If I have a headache, you’ll know. If I had a great day, you’ll know! If I’m in a funk or struggling, you’ll know! And yes, if I FAIL and have some chew, YOU WILL KNOW. This IS real and by hiding stuff from you guys/gals, we’re DOING nothing positive in the end.

 We will be doing several things through out the journey to make this “easier” on me- sunflower seeds, hard candy, exercise, different types of diet, etc.. BUT, in the end, it’s YOU who can and MUST hold me accountable!

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We’ll do many things on the fly and some things we will plan, but you will ALWAYS be informed and we will NOT hold anything back.

 We’re doing this for a few reasons. Yes, first and foremost, it’s to help me STOP chewing forever. Also, why not hope we get lucky and inspire someone to quit chewing and/or smoking as well?

 Reality says, and anyone who has ever sincerely tried to beat nicotine addiction will tell you that this will not be 100 days of smiles and cart wheels. I will be annoyed and annoying, I will be achy, tired, exhausted, and sometimes down right useless for the day. I will be irritable and flat out grouchy. Stacy, I’m sorry and I love you! And again, through extensive research and experience from my last attempt to quit, I learned that I will literally dream about chewing and I will think about chewing often, VERY often. I’ll have insomnia, mouth soreness (healing process), sore throat, and many more spiffy “side effects,” as I go on this journey. But guess what? I will have all of this happening to me because I made the choice to start chewing smokeless tobacco in 1997-1998 my sophomore year in high school. Any crap my brain and body go through during these 100 days are because of MY OWN ACTIONS. I have no one to blame but myself.

 You all know that nicotine is a BRUTAL addiction to beat, which is why I’m asking all of you to help me. Nicotine is the most heavily used drug in America. Not because it’s awesome, because it only takes a few “dips” or “puffs” before your brain tells your body to become tolerant and dependent on it. Here’s another “fun” fact for you. Nicotine is a drug that causes you to need more and more. Some people need more than others but if you have been addicted to nicotine for a significant amount of time, think back to the first year or two and then think about today……if you’re honest with yourself, you’ll realize that you smoke/chew more today than you did then. You do that because it takes more nicotine to give you the same feeling you used to get.

 Why am I doing this now? Well, there are many reasons. According to the “experts,” The most important reason I’m supposed to be quitting is for myself. Yes, that is a HUGE reason, but I’m not sure if it’s reason #1. For the sake of this, Let’s say the biggest reason I’m quitting is for me so we can get it out of the way. Below are more reasons, VERY important reasons as to why I’m doing this.
• For my beautiful fiancĂ©
• For the kids- Auden (7) and Beckett (5)
• I want to be around for the kids and enjoy the process of them growing into responsible young men and women
• Would I want Auden to date a boy who chews/smokes? Hell no! (ok fine, I don’t want her dating anyone….ever.)
• How can I be a role model for them if I were to one day catch them smoking/chewing if I chew!?
 • Oh, did I mention that my addiction costs this family OVER $230.00 a month? Well, I mentioned it now!
 • It runs my life! I actually plan things around my dipping schedule. PATHETIC!
 • It’s gross! It’s that simple. It’s gross. 
• There are many more and you’ll see them during this journey.

 According to www.killthecan.org, here is what I will be going through on Days 1,2, and 3. IF, and I mean IF I get through these three days, I’ll only have 97 days to go! Shit….

 Days 1 through 3 - Pure hell. You will walk in the fog. Nothing will seem real. You're brain is wondering where the hell its fix is and it is going to punish you until you come up with it. 72 hours, that's all you need to get the nicotine out of your system. This is the only time you will go through physical withdrawal. Drink lots of water. Don't take your anger out on your loved ones.

 Alrighty, now you have a somewhat detailed description of what we are trying to accomplish here, but I’d like to tell you just a little bit more and then you can see for yourself what happens. We don’t even know what will happen!

 Last paragraph, I promise! In a nut shell, we are going on a 100 day journey that will follow Stacy and me during my quest to quit chewing/smokeless tobacco/dip. Call it what you want, it’s all the same! We’ll be documenting this through blogs, vlogs and photos. There will be new things added all the time and our vlogs, blogs and photos will show a lot more than my quest to quit chewing. Our Life Gone Life page (follow us on Facebook) wasn’t made with the intention of this “Dip Quitting” Journey, we just thought it would be one of many good/interesting pieces of our lives that we thought we’d share with all of you. Like I said, maybe this will inspire someone out there to quit nicotine. If I can do it, anyone can do it! The question is…..Can I do it?

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 You can follow all of our vlogs, blogs and photos by liking and following our page on Facebook called “Life Gone Live”
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