Day 90: Holy shi!t, it's day 90! What happened to all the days? I remember it wasn't too long ago when all I did was bitch and moan to Stacy about how I could never make it to day 100, how it was so damn far away and how it was a mistake to not only quit chewing, but to quit with the public reading/watching. Thanks to all of you, and especially her, I'm now on day 90 and feeling better than EVER! and I mean EVER! I'll never be able to explain how grateful I am for all the people who put up with my crap. I'll never be able to explain how good I really do feel. I feel clear, motivated, excited. I feel like I just conquered Rome and I'm now prepared for any other challenge life brings my family and I. With all of that being said, one of many important things I have learned through out this journey is to never ever let my guard down. I'm an addict and I need to remember that ALL the time.
By definition addict means; A person who is addicted to an activity, habit or substance.
Yes, I am an addict. Just because I didn't do heroin or cocaine or a different "serious" drug doesn't mean I'm not an addict. Believe me, I don't like admitting this. It took me 16 years to admit I was an addict. I always justified my addiction by saying it wasn't one of the "major drugs," so I wasn't an addict. Guess what? It's not only a major drug, it's THE major drug! Millions of people are nicotine addicts but they won't admit it, simply because they find ways to justify it. Many of them, myself included believe they aren't addicts because only people who go to rehab or do bad things are addicts. That's NOT true! Look up the definition for yourself if you don't believe me. Are you an addict? If so, do you even admit it? Being an addict doesn't make you a bad person. That's another misconception that many people have. They believe all addicts are bad people who lie and steal things. Once again, it's because many people believe that ALL addicts are addicted to heroin, cocaine, but not nicotine. You're wrong. I was wrong.
The definition I mentioned above is the definition I got directly from the dictionary. Therefore, MANY people are addicts and not all of them are drug addicts! However, drug addicts are not only the most common addicts, but also the most misunderstood. When I say misunderstood I don't mean their actions, I mean the proper an accurate definition. So, I'll ask one more time. Please read the definition of addict and go look in the mirror. While looking in the mirror, ask yourself if you're an addict. If you lie to yourself, you'll continue to be addicted. If you're honest and admit it (IF you have an addiction), you just reached and conquered the first and toughest step. ADMITTING it! If you REALLY want to conquer step one, admit to someone else you're an addict! Go ahead, try it...It's not a cliche, admitting you're an addict is the TOUGHEST step to beat!
I don't claim everyone is an addict, hell most people aren't addicts. The only thing I'm claiming is that true addicts must admit they are an addict before they defeat what they are addicted to. If you're not an addict, I guarantee you personally know an addict of some kind. Think about it for a minute. Do they admit they're an addict? Maybe, maybe not. Probably not...
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