Day 1: I felt weird,
depressed and angry when I just typed “Day 1.”
I also felt happy, powerful and honest.
Either way, it’s the right thing to do.
There are about 65 billion metaphors for this type of stuff, but I can’t
thank you enough: Momma Roush, Stacy, J. Wilt, my Aunt Carrie, my cousins
Scott, Shannon and Jennifer, R. Hautmann, and the rest of you who stood behind
me in their own way. I can’t thank you
enough!
When I woke up this morning, I felt like a failure. I felt like I wasted everyone’s time for the
last two weeks, which is probably true.
However, I believe I can make up for that if I get back on track and
stay on track. It’s not easy, as you all now know. It’s not fun at times, well it’s rarely ever
fun. I know I have to put myself through
the “beginning” stages all over again. I
also know I’m willing to do this because I know it’s going to be good for me
and my family. The very same family that
I’m extremely lucky to have in the first place.
Welp, I now have to go three days. That’s my first goal. Why three days? Well, after three days, or 72 hours, the body
is nicotine free. Granted, I only had
one dip so maybe it’s only two days, one day, etc. However, I’m assuming the worst and I’m going
to say I need three full days to get all of the nicotine out of my body. I have
beaten this stage before and I’ll beat it again. The family and friend support is HUGE (it’s
always huge) at this stage. I’m already
thanking all of you! Now’s your chance to get out though lol.
Most people would usually make some big changes after
failing to reach the same goal twice.
Sure, I have changes to make, but big changes? I can’t.
I have a family and I have things I NEED to do for and with my
family. The biggest change I need to
make is my will power. I need to have
more of it! It’s that simple. As my mom said the other day, I need to “man
up!” Yup, my mother said that. It was hilarious, but she was serious at the
same time. Believe me, when mothers
speak, you better listen! I learned this
from Stacy, Stacy’s mom and my mom. They
kind of have a way of getting their message across lol.
When I wake up tomorrow, I’ll be back on track to my
original goal: 100 days. I’m really damn
far away but I know I need to take it one day at a time. Hell, one hour at a time. Hell, one minute at a time!
Only god knows who will be there at the end of my journey,
but I know I’ll be there, dip free for 100 days. That I KNOW! Here goes nothin’….
Good night all…
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